His Old Girlfriend

2 Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.
Ephesians 4:2 

I am a snapper type of wife. I don’t nag or berate my husband, but sometimes  I feel like I get so wound up, like a Jack In The Box, that I can’t even breathe.  My poor husband always seems to be the one who gets that final turn in, and out I pop! Snapping away.

Sometimes, he even says he misses his old girlfriend. Don’t worry, he’s still talking about me, just pre-marriage, pre-kids me. Before stressful jobs. Before stressful kids. Before time became so scarce and our lives became so over-scheduled. I haven’t morphed into some crazy monster, but I am certainly not as carefree, not as easy going and  I know I’m not as sweet.

It really was easier before kids. I wouldn’t trade my darlings for the world, but there is something about having them that makes us, as their   mothers, become increasingly wound up and far more rigid. We worry and fret over their lives and we just want to make everything perfect for them. Then we also want time to ourselves to just breathe and relax. We are pulled in a million different directions and are depended on for so much. We truly run ourselves ragged.

And where does that leave our husbands?

I am grateful that as my relationship grows with Christ, priorities and relationships in my life start to become less foggy and I can see things much more clearly. Christ should always be first, but our husbands should be right there holding the second place spot. Not our children. Not our friends. Not our jobs.

Our husbands deserve the softer, fuzzier versions of ourselves. We probably aren’t ever going to go back to being the same girls they took vows with and that’s OK. I’d take the 35 year old version of myself over the 24 year old version any day.

But I can still pull out some of the softer and fuzzier stuff. It’s down there somewhere.

I just need to make sure it’s up there close to the top..

Not buried beneath things that don’t really matter.





One thought on “His Old Girlfriend

  1. I am certainly not the same either. Life happens and those days pass by, but one day we will wake up and wonder where all this craziness is, only to miss it and long for it to return. Any parent can surely understand the stress that comes from worrying about their children, job, money, etc..but all we have to do is look to the Cross and it puts it all in perspective. Love you


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