I have been feeling off balance these last few weeks. Work and school and other demands have knocked me off kilter and I have started to feel like a hamster on a forever spinning wheel. Sometimes I feel as if I’m just enduring this thing called life, not actually enjoying it.
And my poor family takes the brunt of it when I am feeling like a volcano getting ready to explode. I can feel the wary looks my husband gives me when I snap at him about something little. My boys actually start to become exasperated by me. They like their normal mom. Not the too grumpy, too tired, no patience woman who has invaded their home.
Thankfully, as I grow closer in my walk with Christ, I am more aware of my need for stability. I crave more time with The Word and for more quiet conversations with Jesus. I look to Him first instead of to other things to help pull me back to the center.
I have also learned to really appreciate the people in my life who help to lift me up, and to calm me down, when I am about to go into a stupid panic for no good reason. (Really my problems are not that bad.) Friends who somehow, magically, know I need a “shot of encouragement” and send a comforting text at just the right time, or coworkers who greet me with a warm hug because they can sense I really need one.
The Book of Ecclesiastes reminds us that God wants his children to be happy. He has given this gift to us and while it can be a long hard road, full of many bumps along the way, it is not meant to be life of just running the hamster wheel.
We aren’t meant to just endure this life
We are meant to enjoy it.
Ecclesiastes 2:24-25 So I decided there is nothing better than to enjoy food and drink and to find satisfaction in work. Then I realized that these pleasures are from the hand of God. For who can eat or enjoy anything apart from him?